Chuck Norris

I forgot to mention how angry I am at the whole wide world and the world wide web right now. Apparently, I have been locked out of pop culture. My counterpart noticed someone who had these silly Chuck Norris sayings all over his debate evidence. 2 or 3 times later on, we heard more buzzings of Chuck Norris. Apparently, for the first time ever, not being a late night fan has somehow bit me in the ass. We have now discovered the new culture of Chuck Norris. If you are in the dark, did you know that:

Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

There are no disabled people. Only people who have met Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris does not have AIDS but he gives it to people anyway.

If you have somehow missed this strange cultural phenomenon, as I myself have, go ahead and indulge yourself in more Chuck Norris Jokes. I won't tell anyone that you were in the dark, too.